I feel awful. I think I may have hurt someone's feelings. Usually, I can just go to the person that I've hurt and apologize and ask for forgiveness. This time, I can't do that. (Trust me; if I could, I would. The reasons why I can't are too private to discuss on an internet blog.) It isn't a pride issue. I would much rather go apologize for something I've done than to have both of us feeling awful about it. If I could, I would pick up the phone right now and apologize and ask for forgiveness....
But I can't.
So I am left with the awful feeling of knowing I may have hurt someone I love and respect...
...And with the reminder that, though I did not mean anything AT ALL in a derogatory way toward this person (my words were actually aimed at myself about a particular thing), that through the ears of another, a different meaning may become attached to my words and shared with others.
I pray that God will work it all out so this person knows the true intent of my words...and that she will know that I think highly of her and care about her.
And for me, I pray that I will more closely watch the words I say so that I don't hurt others.
And in a similar instance, I typed something on my blog a little while ago that may have been misunderstood. Part of the reason I wrote it was because I was grateful that a certain person went out of their way to smile and make me feel valued in a circumstance that was somewhat overwhelming....but I’m afraid that I didn’t convey the true meaning of what I wanted to say. So if you’re reading this, please know how grateful I am that you have gone out of your way to be kind and to smile at me at times that you have known were difficult for me.
I do notice.
And I am deeply grateful.
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Edit: God worked this all out the very next day after I posted this.
Sweet forgiveness.
Peaceful heart.
Thankful for the way God works things out in my life.
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