I sighed and thought, "It's another Psalm 117 night." A "Psalm 117 night" for me is when I only read Psalm 117 because I'm too tired to read anything else in the Bible. It usually means that either my life is incredibly busy or that I haven't managed my time well that day. You see, Psalm 117 is the shortest Psalm in the Bible....so if I'm feeling wiped out, I choose to read that because I can read it quickly and it fulfills my desire to read something from the Bible each day. Of course, reading it quickly and not really thinking about it doesn't really do all that much for my spiritual life. Oh, I feel better that I read something from the Bible, but it doesn't touch my heart as much as it does when I really sit down and give my total attention and some quality time to my reading. (And before I go further, I need to say that Psalm 117 is a great Psalm....it's just that I don't think God intended for me to use that Psalm as a "quick read" before I go to bed just so I can feel like I read something from the Bible that day.) Anyway, that night I read Psalm 117, fell into bed, and because I was craving God, I prayed, "Lord, please feed my soul." Immediately, I realized that He couldn't "feed" my soul when I wasn't "eating"....He couldn't fill me up spiritually if I wasn't reading the Bible. Reading Psalm 117 the way I was doing...quickly and without too much thought ...was like only eating a snack. I was hungry and I needed a meal. I determined in my heart to do better.
I still have "Psalm 117 nights".....honestly, some nights I'm so tired that I don't even read anything from the Bible....though I try really hard not to do that. The Bible says, "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." (James 4:8) When I read His word, I draw near to Him and He draws near to me....many times, I feel His presence....I have more inner strength to get through my days....I'm more at peace and my heart is filled with joy. And I learn about the person that I consider to be the most important in my life...Jesus.
Yes, I realize God understands when we're tired...He knows we're human. I don't think He's up there in heaven looking down on me angrily on the days I don't read from the Bible at all or when I only read Psalm 117....but I think He does desire to spend time with me....with all of us. One of my pastors used to say, "God has nothing better to do than to spend time with you." I love that! And I want to spend time with Him because I love Him.
And now....if you'll excuse me....
.... it's time to "eat"! : )
